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kinkfestTitle: Drink & Show
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
laurus_nobilis
Rating: PG
Warnings: Drunk alien robots!
Word count: 1058
Prompt: Transformers (G1), any/all Decepticons - drunken antics and the Internet: "Y halo thar floor."
Summary: The Decepticons get drunk, and the results are there for the whole world to see.
Decepticons didn't have a lot of rules. Or, rather, all of their rules could be summarized into a single one: don't make Megatron angry. It was simple, really. So much that even his army of morons should have been able to grasp it, out of self-preservation instincts at least.
Apparently that was too much to ask for.
It wasn't the fact that every single one of them had managed to get overcharged. That happened quite often and, technically, this time "everyone" included Megatron himself - not that it made a difference when he was in the mood for making a few heads roll, of course. It wasn't even that they were still quite useless, even after recharge. At least they were in their own base this time and didn't have to worry about any attacks until they recovered.
No, the real bad news (that he had managed to extract from Soundwave after a lot of uncharacteristic dancing around the issue) were much worse than that. Apparently their energon-influenced nonsense from the previous night was now available for the whole word to see. Including some very interesting footage of the Decepticon leader rambling about the wonders of Cybertron in a… less than coherent way.
It was unacceptable. First of all, because it was quite obvious that all of that footage came from their own security cameras. One would think they'd have a better use than that. Also, having those videos online was a large problem in and of itself. Earthlings were supposed to fear him! He had spent decades terrorizing them, showing them the immeasurable power of the Decepticon army, and now they were watching Ramjet and Thrust getting much too friendly with each other on YouTube. He was going to need quite a lot of chaos and destruction to make up for this.
But he would worry about all of that later, once he had relieved some stress. And he knew just the way to do that. He might not know how this had happened, but he was absolutely certain of who had made it possible.
"STARSCREAM!" he roared as he made his way towards the main control room. "I want you here this instant, you miserable-"
And then he stopped dead. Starscream was already there, and it looked like he hadn't even noticed any of the shouting directed at him. He was just staring at the main screen with an expression that was half shocked, half horrified.
It was, all things considered, perfectly understandable.
The video currently playing showed none other than the Air Commander himself, looking like he was having quite the fun (which was somewhat creepy) and wrapping an arm around each of his trinemate's shoulders (which was very creepy). Not only that: he was singing at the top of his voice. And overacting, too. It would have been hilarious if the screeching wasn't so painful. Skywarp joined him from time to time, when he managed to remember the lyrics; Thundercracker looked as if he wanted to run away and his lack of balance was the only thing stopping him.
But the worst part of it all, the truly disturbing thing, was the realization that it wasn't Starscream's fault this time. There was no doubt about that. If there was something that his second in command would never, ever do, it was making a fool of himself. Well, making a fool of himself on purpose.
It was an unsettling thought. Everything was always Starscream's fault. It was a law of nature, or something. But if it hadn't been him, then who…?
"What is the meaning of this?" Megatron asked to no one in particular.
"… it was really good high grade?"
As if to prove the point, the Starscream in the video let out a particularly loud we've come to be the rulers of your world. Thundercracker groaned, tried to leave yet again, and stumbled, dragging the other two Seekers down with him. It was hard to hear over Starscream's predictable hissy fit, but Skywarp said something that sounded vaguely like "why hallo thar floor".
Megatron slapped his forehead in frustration. Starscream took a not-so-subtle step to the side, the coward.
"When I find out who did this," Megatron said, in that almost calm voice he only used when he was this close to slagging the first unlucky idiot who crossed his path, "I will make him regret he was ever manufactured."
"It's the Autobots' doing, obviously!"
"Of course not, you idiot! This is was filmed by our security cameras. The Autobots don't have access to this footage."
"But it can't have been an inside job!" Starscream exclaimed, somehow managing to sound as if the idea of sabotaging his own team was some newly discovered horror that had never crossed his mind. "No one would be stupid enough to—"
A crashing sound coming from the video interrupted him. The three overcharged Seekers had all tried to stand up at the same time, only to fall all over each other again. After a bit of struggling, Starscream found his way out of the pile of limbs and swayed away muttering to himself, perhaps to find more energon or to complain about his trinemates to whoever he found. Skywarp, who looked inexplicably happy, flopped over Thundercracker. The blue jet groaned in frustration.
"Get off me," he muttered, trying to push the other Seeker away. He didn't seem to have enough coordination for that, however.
"You're no fun."
"Get off."
"Gonna show everyone, y'know. How no fun you are."
"Whatever," replied Thundercracker, right before passing out into recharge. Skywarp just grinned, like the moron he was. And then he disappeared from view.
Megatron turned to his second with a knowing look.
"You were saying?"
"So… how far do you think he's teleported by now?"
"Not far enough," he snarled. "Go find him. Now."
"Me? Why don't you send Laserbe- of course, mighty Megatron, right away!" Starscream finished, after getting a particularly expressive glare, and rushed away.
Well. It was time to make Soundwave get rid of all those stupid videos, then. And hope not too many people had saved them already.
… come to think of it, it might not be such a bad idea to keep a copy of Starscream's little number at hand. You never knew when you might need some blackmail material, after all.
Author:
laurus_nobilisRating: PG
Warnings: Drunk alien robots!
Word count: 1058
Prompt: Transformers (G1), any/all Decepticons - drunken antics and the Internet: "Y halo thar floor."
Summary: The Decepticons get drunk, and the results are there for the whole world to see.
Decepticons didn't have a lot of rules. Or, rather, all of their rules could be summarized into a single one: don't make Megatron angry. It was simple, really. So much that even his army of morons should have been able to grasp it, out of self-preservation instincts at least.
Apparently that was too much to ask for.
It wasn't the fact that every single one of them had managed to get overcharged. That happened quite often and, technically, this time "everyone" included Megatron himself - not that it made a difference when he was in the mood for making a few heads roll, of course. It wasn't even that they were still quite useless, even after recharge. At least they were in their own base this time and didn't have to worry about any attacks until they recovered.
No, the real bad news (that he had managed to extract from Soundwave after a lot of uncharacteristic dancing around the issue) were much worse than that. Apparently their energon-influenced nonsense from the previous night was now available for the whole word to see. Including some very interesting footage of the Decepticon leader rambling about the wonders of Cybertron in a… less than coherent way.
It was unacceptable. First of all, because it was quite obvious that all of that footage came from their own security cameras. One would think they'd have a better use than that. Also, having those videos online was a large problem in and of itself. Earthlings were supposed to fear him! He had spent decades terrorizing them, showing them the immeasurable power of the Decepticon army, and now they were watching Ramjet and Thrust getting much too friendly with each other on YouTube. He was going to need quite a lot of chaos and destruction to make up for this.
But he would worry about all of that later, once he had relieved some stress. And he knew just the way to do that. He might not know how this had happened, but he was absolutely certain of who had made it possible.
"STARSCREAM!" he roared as he made his way towards the main control room. "I want you here this instant, you miserable-"
And then he stopped dead. Starscream was already there, and it looked like he hadn't even noticed any of the shouting directed at him. He was just staring at the main screen with an expression that was half shocked, half horrified.
It was, all things considered, perfectly understandable.
The video currently playing showed none other than the Air Commander himself, looking like he was having quite the fun (which was somewhat creepy) and wrapping an arm around each of his trinemate's shoulders (which was very creepy). Not only that: he was singing at the top of his voice. And overacting, too. It would have been hilarious if the screeching wasn't so painful. Skywarp joined him from time to time, when he managed to remember the lyrics; Thundercracker looked as if he wanted to run away and his lack of balance was the only thing stopping him.
But the worst part of it all, the truly disturbing thing, was the realization that it wasn't Starscream's fault this time. There was no doubt about that. If there was something that his second in command would never, ever do, it was making a fool of himself. Well, making a fool of himself on purpose.
It was an unsettling thought. Everything was always Starscream's fault. It was a law of nature, or something. But if it hadn't been him, then who…?
"What is the meaning of this?" Megatron asked to no one in particular.
"… it was really good high grade?"
As if to prove the point, the Starscream in the video let out a particularly loud we've come to be the rulers of your world. Thundercracker groaned, tried to leave yet again, and stumbled, dragging the other two Seekers down with him. It was hard to hear over Starscream's predictable hissy fit, but Skywarp said something that sounded vaguely like "why hallo thar floor".
Megatron slapped his forehead in frustration. Starscream took a not-so-subtle step to the side, the coward.
"When I find out who did this," Megatron said, in that almost calm voice he only used when he was this close to slagging the first unlucky idiot who crossed his path, "I will make him regret he was ever manufactured."
"It's the Autobots' doing, obviously!"
"Of course not, you idiot! This is was filmed by our security cameras. The Autobots don't have access to this footage."
"But it can't have been an inside job!" Starscream exclaimed, somehow managing to sound as if the idea of sabotaging his own team was some newly discovered horror that had never crossed his mind. "No one would be stupid enough to—"
A crashing sound coming from the video interrupted him. The three overcharged Seekers had all tried to stand up at the same time, only to fall all over each other again. After a bit of struggling, Starscream found his way out of the pile of limbs and swayed away muttering to himself, perhaps to find more energon or to complain about his trinemates to whoever he found. Skywarp, who looked inexplicably happy, flopped over Thundercracker. The blue jet groaned in frustration.
"Get off me," he muttered, trying to push the other Seeker away. He didn't seem to have enough coordination for that, however.
"You're no fun."
"Get off."
"Gonna show everyone, y'know. How no fun you are."
"Whatever," replied Thundercracker, right before passing out into recharge. Skywarp just grinned, like the moron he was. And then he disappeared from view.
Megatron turned to his second with a knowing look.
"You were saying?"
"So… how far do you think he's teleported by now?"
"Not far enough," he snarled. "Go find him. Now."
"Me? Why don't you send Laserbe- of course, mighty Megatron, right away!" Starscream finished, after getting a particularly expressive glare, and rushed away.
Well. It was time to make Soundwave get rid of all those stupid videos, then. And hope not too many people had saved them already.
… come to think of it, it might not be such a bad idea to keep a copy of Starscream's little number at hand. You never knew when you might need some blackmail material, after all.
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