kinkfest | Secret Chord. (D.Gray-man, Lavi, Allen)

Title: Secret Chord.
Author/Artist:

allira_dream
Rating: PG.
Warnings: Nothing.
Word count: 300.
Summary: What Lavi thinks will happen with him, what Lavi fears might come true. What might not happen at all.
A/N: Written for

springkink: D.Gray-Man, Lavi/Allen; power; "And every breath we drew was hallelujah"

Secret Chord.
I heard there was a secret chord
that David played and it pleased the Lord,
but you don't really care for music, do you?
'Hallelujah', Jeff Buckley's cover

It will be like this: one day, when he's fighting, Lavi will reach for his hammer and then he will feel something. He's not quite sure what, but he knows it'll be big: saints and martyrs talk about being touched by god as if it was fire, Lenalee says it was as if she was burning, the moment she chose her Innocence over the possibility of a normal life.

So, Lavi will feel that something, that secret chord of holiness and martyrdom and he will hesitate. It probably won't be long, but in a battle, even a second or two are important, a breath that someone stopped giving, a broken hallelujah that could be lost with a gunshut or a hand elbow-deep into your guts. But then -- because he has learned that bad luck is contagious -- Allen will be the one to stop a Noah or an akuma of flattening him to the ground into a blood splatter. Allen will keep on fighting because it's just what he does, and he'll ask him if he's alright.

And Lavi will lie: he will say yeah, sure, and he'll go back to fighting as if nothing had happened, as if he wasn't praying for his Innocence not to change, to remain just as it was, and no-one will know right then that he's betraying them, that once the battle is over, if he survives, he'll tell Bookman and then they'll leave the Order for good.

Allen won't know what he did, who he saved, the fact that he saved him just so that he can run away, and no-one, not even Bookman, will know how much thinking about that day terrifies Lavi, how much he finds himself praying the way he never does, so that that day never comes.