Title: One Big Crazy Family
Author/Artist: queenoftheskies
Rating: PG
Warnings: momentary thoughts of sex
Word count: 1,345
Summary: Angelo's friends come to the rescue when he needs them most.
Prompt: #7. Dragon Quest VIII, Eight/Yangus/Jessica/Angelo: Close-knit group - like one big, crazy family.
A/N: I'm very sorry I'm late posting this.
One Big Crazy Family
I don’t know why I cared. I should have learned my lesson when I was a child, but no matter how cruel he was to me, no matter how many times he pulled pranks on me or made me look bad in front of the others, I always looked up to him as my big brother.
There’s something almost twisted, I guess, about idolizing someone who tortures you emotionally, someone you know has an evil streak just waiting to flare out of control. But, when he’s the only family you have, what else is a man supposed to do?
The others couldn’t understand what it was like to need a family, what it was like to have been abandoned as a young child. And, while I knew that, on some dark level, Marcello had cultivated this need in me, I didn’t care. I only wanted him to acknowledge me, to accept me as his brother.
“Angelo?” Her quiet voice broke through my troubled musing. “Are you okay?”
My brother just tried to kill me. What do you think? “I’m fine.” I even forced a smile for her benefit. They didn’t really know me; they didn’t really care. They’d never be able to tell the difference anyway.
“Well...” She actually looked doubtful, stood around a moment in uncomfortable silence like she had something else to say.
“I’m fine.” I’d learned to lie about the same time I’d learned that my brother hated me. I was adept at it just like I was adept at pretending I was fine. Sometimes, I was even adept enough to convince myself.
“If you need anything…”
Yes, I needed. I needed her beneath me. I needed to pound into her, my hands on her breasts. That would drive the rejection, the fear of dying alone without a family, without anyone to love, from my heart.
I felt a twinge of guilt as she turned and I caught the glimpse of concern in her eyes. I didn’t really want to hurt her, didn’t really want to use her. I just wanted… Someone to care about. Someone who would care about me. And as much as I hated to admit it, I didn’t know how to go about loving others.
I was almost asleep, my eyes captured by the fire as it burned down to smoldering embers, when I noticed the flicker of shadow as it passed across the ground in front of me. I was up at once, rapier in hand.
“Sorry.” Eight dropped down onto the rocky ground beside me. “I didn’t mean to startle you.
What do you want? At least I had the good grace not to utter the words out load. “I guess…I didn’t hear you approach.”
Eight twisted his hands in his lap and I wanted to ask him why he wasn’t spending time with his horse princess or keeping the old toad, Trode, company. Instead, I waited, amazed at the amount of respect I had for this young palace guard.
“I…I just wanted you to know I heard what Marcello said.” He finally looked up to meet my eyes.
I choked back the anger, the hurt, the age-old shame that burned inside me. “I…see.” It wasn’t much of an answer, but it was the only answer I had.
“I never knew my family.”
The guilt I’d felt at dismissing Jessica returned, two-fold this time, as I wondered what it would have been like to be an orphan and have no family at all. “I’m…sorry.”
“Oh, no.” He shook his head in protest. “That’s not what I meant. I just…well, I can’t imagine what it would be like to have a brother who wanted to hurt people while you were trying to help them and…” His shoulders rose and fell. “I guess I thought it would hurt a lot and…I wanted you to know that if you needed to talk…well, I’m here. Just yell.”
He waited for me to say something, but I couldn’t for fear that the tears burning behind my eyes would escape, that he would see me cry and think me a failure as my brother so often had. When I remained silent, he left, patting my arm with an awkward gesture that made his cheeks flame.
It was a long time before I thought of sleeping again.
Yangus must have seen us talking, must have realized that I hadn’t eaten, for he lumbered over with a plate of meat and wild vegetables that set my mouth to watering in spite of the fact that my heart ached and I wanted very much to sleep. “I thought you might be hungry wot with the fact you haven’t eaten and all.”
He shoved the plate my direction with a grin that faded when I hesitated in taking it.
“It’s real good and all. The guv and Miss Jessica, they cooked it, so it’s safe to eat.”
“I had no doubts of its safety,” I assured him, accepting the plate. “Thank you. I…hadn’t realized I was so hungry.”
And I hadn’t. My stomach rumbled as the aroma of food long cold filled my nostrils. It was good, the best food I’d had in a long time, and he’d even brought along a skin of ale for me to wash dinner down with. For the first time since we’d left the ruined city, I felt almost human.
“Do you ever just wants to kill him and get it over with?” Yangus asked, shifting back and forth from one foot to another.
“Yes.” The answer surprised me and yet it didn’t. Every time he’d hurt me, every time he’d cursed me, every time he’d laughed at me, I’d wanted him to love me, but I’d also wanted him to die.
“That makes you a better man that wot he is then,” he said, gathering up the plate and skin. “That you got the will-power to ignore him instead of turning into a monster like he is.”
I’d never thought of it that way, not really, and I swallowed hard, against the painful lump that had risen into my throat. I couldn’t stop the tears. I didn’t even want to stop them. They’d been a long time in coming and I only hoped that my companions wouldn’t think me too big of a coward and leave without me when morning tinged the sky.
I needn’t have feared, though. Jessica noticed me first and though she hesitated, obviously frozen in doubt, when I turned away, she came to me, wrapped gentle arms around me, and let me cry.
We weren’t alone when I sniffled the last tear away, much to my surprise. Eight and Yangus had pulled their bedrolls close and one of them had brought Jessica’s, so we were all together in the light of the fire.
“You don’t need ‘im no more,” Yangus said with a dark glower the direction of the city.
“He’s right,” Jessica agreed, brushing my cheeks with the tips of her slender fingers. “As long as you allow him to destroy you, you’ll have no peace.”
“You’ve got us now,” Eight said, his eyes lingering on each of our companions.
“What we’re doing,” Jessica whispered, “binds us closer together than any blood ever could.”
And, I looked at them—each of them—realizing that, in a very real way, we were all alike: we’d all lost family or been abandoned by family, but whatever the reason, whatever the cause, we were all alone now. Alone and facing a future so uncertain as to almost guarantee our deaths.
I didn’t need him, not when I had them, not when they cared about me more than any real family I’d ever had.
Dropping down to the ground so suddenly as to make it lurch, Yangus offered me a frightening grin. I couldn’t avoid the hug that followed it, but something about the words warmed me when he assured me, “You’d be having trouble getting rid of us even if you wanted to. We’re all just one big, crazy family now.”
Author/Artist: queenoftheskies
Rating: PG
Warnings: momentary thoughts of sex
Word count: 1,345
Summary: Angelo's friends come to the rescue when he needs them most.
Prompt: #7. Dragon Quest VIII, Eight/Yangus/Jessica/Angelo: Close-knit group - like one big, crazy family.
A/N: I'm very sorry I'm late posting this.
One Big Crazy Family
I don’t know why I cared. I should have learned my lesson when I was a child, but no matter how cruel he was to me, no matter how many times he pulled pranks on me or made me look bad in front of the others, I always looked up to him as my big brother.
There’s something almost twisted, I guess, about idolizing someone who tortures you emotionally, someone you know has an evil streak just waiting to flare out of control. But, when he’s the only family you have, what else is a man supposed to do?
The others couldn’t understand what it was like to need a family, what it was like to have been abandoned as a young child. And, while I knew that, on some dark level, Marcello had cultivated this need in me, I didn’t care. I only wanted him to acknowledge me, to accept me as his brother.
“Angelo?” Her quiet voice broke through my troubled musing. “Are you okay?”
My brother just tried to kill me. What do you think? “I’m fine.” I even forced a smile for her benefit. They didn’t really know me; they didn’t really care. They’d never be able to tell the difference anyway.
“Well...” She actually looked doubtful, stood around a moment in uncomfortable silence like she had something else to say.
“I’m fine.” I’d learned to lie about the same time I’d learned that my brother hated me. I was adept at it just like I was adept at pretending I was fine. Sometimes, I was even adept enough to convince myself.
“If you need anything…”
Yes, I needed. I needed her beneath me. I needed to pound into her, my hands on her breasts. That would drive the rejection, the fear of dying alone without a family, without anyone to love, from my heart.
I felt a twinge of guilt as she turned and I caught the glimpse of concern in her eyes. I didn’t really want to hurt her, didn’t really want to use her. I just wanted… Someone to care about. Someone who would care about me. And as much as I hated to admit it, I didn’t know how to go about loving others.
I was almost asleep, my eyes captured by the fire as it burned down to smoldering embers, when I noticed the flicker of shadow as it passed across the ground in front of me. I was up at once, rapier in hand.
“Sorry.” Eight dropped down onto the rocky ground beside me. “I didn’t mean to startle you.
What do you want? At least I had the good grace not to utter the words out load. “I guess…I didn’t hear you approach.”
Eight twisted his hands in his lap and I wanted to ask him why he wasn’t spending time with his horse princess or keeping the old toad, Trode, company. Instead, I waited, amazed at the amount of respect I had for this young palace guard.
“I…I just wanted you to know I heard what Marcello said.” He finally looked up to meet my eyes.
I choked back the anger, the hurt, the age-old shame that burned inside me. “I…see.” It wasn’t much of an answer, but it was the only answer I had.
“I never knew my family.”
The guilt I’d felt at dismissing Jessica returned, two-fold this time, as I wondered what it would have been like to be an orphan and have no family at all. “I’m…sorry.”
“Oh, no.” He shook his head in protest. “That’s not what I meant. I just…well, I can’t imagine what it would be like to have a brother who wanted to hurt people while you were trying to help them and…” His shoulders rose and fell. “I guess I thought it would hurt a lot and…I wanted you to know that if you needed to talk…well, I’m here. Just yell.”
He waited for me to say something, but I couldn’t for fear that the tears burning behind my eyes would escape, that he would see me cry and think me a failure as my brother so often had. When I remained silent, he left, patting my arm with an awkward gesture that made his cheeks flame.
It was a long time before I thought of sleeping again.
Yangus must have seen us talking, must have realized that I hadn’t eaten, for he lumbered over with a plate of meat and wild vegetables that set my mouth to watering in spite of the fact that my heart ached and I wanted very much to sleep. “I thought you might be hungry wot with the fact you haven’t eaten and all.”
He shoved the plate my direction with a grin that faded when I hesitated in taking it.
“It’s real good and all. The guv and Miss Jessica, they cooked it, so it’s safe to eat.”
“I had no doubts of its safety,” I assured him, accepting the plate. “Thank you. I…hadn’t realized I was so hungry.”
And I hadn’t. My stomach rumbled as the aroma of food long cold filled my nostrils. It was good, the best food I’d had in a long time, and he’d even brought along a skin of ale for me to wash dinner down with. For the first time since we’d left the ruined city, I felt almost human.
“Do you ever just wants to kill him and get it over with?” Yangus asked, shifting back and forth from one foot to another.
“Yes.” The answer surprised me and yet it didn’t. Every time he’d hurt me, every time he’d cursed me, every time he’d laughed at me, I’d wanted him to love me, but I’d also wanted him to die.
“That makes you a better man that wot he is then,” he said, gathering up the plate and skin. “That you got the will-power to ignore him instead of turning into a monster like he is.”
I’d never thought of it that way, not really, and I swallowed hard, against the painful lump that had risen into my throat. I couldn’t stop the tears. I didn’t even want to stop them. They’d been a long time in coming and I only hoped that my companions wouldn’t think me too big of a coward and leave without me when morning tinged the sky.
I needn’t have feared, though. Jessica noticed me first and though she hesitated, obviously frozen in doubt, when I turned away, she came to me, wrapped gentle arms around me, and let me cry.
We weren’t alone when I sniffled the last tear away, much to my surprise. Eight and Yangus had pulled their bedrolls close and one of them had brought Jessica’s, so we were all together in the light of the fire.
“You don’t need ‘im no more,” Yangus said with a dark glower the direction of the city.
“He’s right,” Jessica agreed, brushing my cheeks with the tips of her slender fingers. “As long as you allow him to destroy you, you’ll have no peace.”
“You’ve got us now,” Eight said, his eyes lingering on each of our companions.
“What we’re doing,” Jessica whispered, “binds us closer together than any blood ever could.”
And, I looked at them—each of them—realizing that, in a very real way, we were all alike: we’d all lost family or been abandoned by family, but whatever the reason, whatever the cause, we were all alone now. Alone and facing a future so uncertain as to almost guarantee our deaths.
I didn’t need him, not when I had them, not when they cared about me more than any real family I’d ever had.
Dropping down to the ground so suddenly as to make it lurch, Yangus offered me a frightening grin. I couldn’t avoid the hug that followed it, but something about the words warmed me when he assured me, “You’d be having trouble getting rid of us even if you wanted to. We’re all just one big, crazy family now.”
no subject
Date: 2007-07-24 04:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-07-30 08:18 pm (UTC)I'm glad you liked it. It was interesting to figure out how everyone would approach him.
no subject
Date: 2007-07-24 10:23 am (UTC)I love the way they each know instinctively know what he needs most from them. Especially gruff, lovable Yangus.
no subject
Date: 2007-07-30 08:18 pm (UTC)