Cut (One Piece, Zoro/Sanji, PG)

[misura.livejournal.com]

Title: Cut
Author: misura
Rating: PG for no good reason
Warnings: Probably a lot less serious than it could have been.
Summary: On Zoro's jealousy of a pineapple.
A/N: A shortie.


Of Sanji's many annoying habits, which included but were certainly not limited to hogging the blankets, trying to snuggle and dreaming about making love after having coldly informed Zoro that he was 'not in the mood anymore tonight', his obsession with food was the one that Zoro found most incomprehensiblle. An obsession with the eating of food, Zoro might have been able to understand, only it wasn't that. If anything, eating it was the one thing about food that Sanji seemed to find least enjoyable; Sanji mainly seemed to eat because it was expected, because it was necessary to live, and because it would be a shame to waste any good food.

Sanji's obsession lay in the beginning of the process - the part where the food was prepared. He could spend hours contemplating the merits of cinnamon, or the best time to put in a sniff of salt, or the best fruits to put in a salad; where Zoro found a grim and simple kind of poetry in his swordsmanship, Sanji had discovered several heavy tomes of verse in the art of cooking.

Nami's oranges were crooned to - it wasn't, Zoro assured himself, the fact that they were Nami's; it was the fact that they were oranges that got on his nerves; people ought not to talk to fruits.

A particularly fine-looking pineapple (fine-looking to Sanji, that was; to Zoro, it looked like just another pineapple - plenty more where this one'd come from) that Usopp had brought back from a shopping-spree was greeted as a long-lost relative.

Usopp's being the one to deliver it into Sanji's loving hands was promptly forgotten, of course - that should have soothed Zoro's temper, but the way Sanji went on about a mere pineapple grated too much for any kind of soothing effect to take root; Zoro ended up drawing his swords and making a few statements which, had he considered them more carefully, would have left him feeling like an idiot. As it was, he merely felt a grim kind of smugness as Sanji paled and finally put the pineapple down.

(Zoro's smugness lasted all of half an hour, after which Sanji hurried back to the kitchen to assure his dearest darling of a pineapple that Zoro would never, ever be allowed to come anywhere near it with those swords of his - true to his promise, Sanji cut up the pineapple that same evening, to prepare a dessert that Nami declared to be 'delicious', Usopp called 'really good', Luffy proclaimed to be 'not enough' and Zoro, keeping his own council, considered pleasantly refreshing and not too sweet.)

Comments

[liralen.livejournal.com]

*falls over giggling*

I loved the comparison of poetry and tomes... and the whole phrase "people ought not talk to fruits."

And that Zoro does resort to words that were idiotic. *falls over giggling again*

Very nice.

[misura.livejournal.com]

I had a lot of fun writing this, so I'm very happy to hear it was fun to read as well. (Honestly, I don't remember anymore where the pine-apple came from, but once it popped into my head, it wouldn't go away anymore.)

Thank you for your comment!