kinkfest | Bottom of the Sky (Monster, Grimmer/Tenma, PG)

Title: Bottom of the Sky
Author: Star of Heaven
Rating: PG
Warnings: spoilers for the end of the series
Word count: 266
Summary: Tenma reflects on a promise he made with Grimmer.
Prompt: Hurt/comfort - not a good day for a picnic. (June 25)

Bottom of the Sky

Disclaimer: I don't own Monster.
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The only sound in the hospital room was the beeping of Johan's heart monitor, and it also the only reassurance that Johan still lived. Tenma sat next to his bed, although Tenma was so lost in thought that he most likely wouldn't have noticed if Johan suddenly awoke.

"This isn't a good day for a picnic, is it, Dr. Tenma?"

Tenma still hadn't shed any tears. When he had seen Grimmer then, in Ruhenheim, Tenma had known there had been nothing he could do. And yet he had hardly felt remorseful. That massacre in Ruhenheim had made him numb; Grimmer remembered his emotions, and yet Tenma felt like a veil had come over his. Even now, after surviving, his emotions still seemed cloudy.

"Mr. Grimmer, you promised." Tenma had almost sounded like a whiny child.

"I know. I'm sorry." Grimmer had reached out to touch Tenma's face, and then he had begun to cry. If Tenma had been several years younger, he probably would've broken down and sobbed at Grimmer's side. However, although he distinctly remembered a feeling like a knife in his heart, he had not been able to bring himself to shed tears in a place that had been so marked by death.

"Dr. Tenma, I was always myself, wasn't I?"

Tenma jerked his head up. The monitor still beeped at regular intervals, but Tenma found that his hands wouldn't stop trembling. "Damn it," he swore. "I was looking forward to that picnic…"

He could try to reach out for comfort, but he wouldn't succeed. Grimmer was dead, and Tenma still hadn't accepted that.